Are you happy?!

Few weeks ago a friend of mine and I were chilling, and all of the sudden my friend asked me if I was happy, I had to think about it actually, I never realized that it could be a hard question to answer, for few moments, I was asking myself over and over again if I was really happy, and then I though to myself that I owe my friend an answer so I said to her “ I guess so” I know it wasn’t convincing but I couldn’t really say more than that, and then I asked her the same question, she gave me the same answer. It made me think about it, and I kept asking myself what is the real meaning of happiness, the more I thought about it the more I realized that happiness really doesn’t exists, happiness is actually a state of mind. What I mean is that when we buy something that we really want, we become so happy to have that something but then again as time passes by the thing that made us happy doesn’t matter anymore, because its there. Even when people win the lottery they think that they will be happy, yes they will, but as time passes and as their responsibilities becomes more and more this happiness fades away.

As a child I use to love Lady Diana, in fact she was my ideal. She was just perfect, but for some reason she wasn’t happy, she had it all, beauty, money, and power, she was the people’s princess but never happy, she made other people happy but not herself. I have so many examples that happiness is not something that we can find, its something that we feel when something new and exciting happens but its for a short period of time. The big thing about happiness is that even though it’s not true it keeps us going and hoping that we will find it some day. To be happy we have to always look for a new challenge because that’s what is going to make us alive and I guess happy.

Remember happiness is a way of travel not a destination....

Katy Perry - Firework

Here is a song that I find so inspiring and perfect for this time of the year. Since 2010 is coming to an end I thought that it would be nice to post this song in my blog....

Ur Life!

I am on vacation, not planning to go anywhere this time, even though it’s been a while since I traveled last. My heart aches cause it misses the excitement of going somewhere to experience something new and meeting new people...but anyhow I will survive. Here is something that I thought about and thought that it would be nice to share. It’s about life and the way we should live it....


This is your life, do what you love, and do it often. If you do not like something, change it, if you do not like your job quit. If you do not have enough time, stop watching TV. If you are looking for the love of your life, STOP, they will be waiting for you when you start doing things you love. Stop over analyzing, all emotions are beautiful. Open your mind, arms and heart to new things and people. We are united in our experiences. Ask the next person you see what their passion is, and share your inspiring dream with them. Travel often, getting lost will help you find yourself. Some opportunities will only come once. Seize them. Life is about the people you meet and the things you create with them. So go out and start creating. Life is short, live your dream and wear your passion!.

A Childhood Friend...

Ok!, here is something that I have never expected, few weeks ago my brother had an interview at a company called Deloitte, it went very well, he actually got the job, he’s their new senior director. Wow! it’s nice to have a brother in that position I feel so powerful ;) anyways, that’s not why I am writing this post. When my brother went for his first interview the admin person that was there was one of my childhood friends that I have lost contact with ever since I left Lebanon, she recognized my brother and asked him about me, he told her that I was doing good and gave her my contact info. OMG when I saw that email from her and when my brother told me that he found my lost friend I was so happy, I tried to look her up on Facebook before but I never found her. It turned up to be that she is not a Facebook fan which is weird cause she is a very social person. While reading her email this morning I remembered so many things that was buried in my mind and heart and thought that I forgot all about it until this very moment. It felt so good it made me smile. I remembered her beautiful smile and her amazingly beautiful red hair, ooo how much I miss her, I can’t wait to see her again after all these years and tell her all about my history. But then I thought about it, and realized that I will be talking for a long time. Knowing me I won’t be able to express myself very well so I have decided to hear everything about her instead cause she told me that she also has a lot to say, well of course that’s only normal cause the last time we saw each other was like 16 years ago. I know that so many things have happened to us and that sometimes when we meet our old friends again after a long time it will not be the same cause we all change but with this particular friend it’s different, she was always in my mind. When we were younger, we use to do so many crazy things and share even crazier ideas together. Can’t wait to relive it all again with her. I have no idea what am going to do when I see her, but I am pretty sure its ganna be an amazing reunion. I use to always wonder why everyone says that the world is such a small place. Now I know why, and I believe that when we stop looking for what we want, it will come right to us and when we least expect it.

Happiness!

When I was 5 years old my mom always told me that happiness was the key to life, when I went to school they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I wrote down “happy” they told me that I did not understand the assignment and I told them that they didn’t understand life…. (Indeed they didn’t)...

Reality and Dreams...

Last night a friend of mine and I went to see a Leonardo DiCaprio movie called inception, this movie kept me thinking especially as I was driving back home late last night, it made me think, could dreams really be part of our reality! Could we really live a dream, what if reality is a dream that we all believe in? That would mean that everything is possible as long as we all share the same belief. If you throw up a stone in the air you accept it to go down at some point. We can call that gravity, but if we really believed that the stone would continue to float in the air forever, what would happen then? We draw our dreams the way we want it to be, or the right way of saying it the way our brain or subconscious want it to be.

In dreams everything is possible. We all believe that. But In ‘reality’ not everything is possible. We all or most of us believe that. However, what if we all changed our view on that? What if reality offers the same possibilities as dreams do? What if you only feel pain after getting stabbed by a knife because you believe getting stabbed by a knife is painful? So many what ifs that crossed my mind after watching this movie. I know its only a movie but somehow it made me think for a bit and kinda agree on the concept that an idea is something that we plant into our heads in a way that we believe that whatever idea we have is the right thing, and that idea is indeed part of our dreams cause I believe that most of us in this earth dream about our ideas and then make them our reality thinking that it originated from our reality but the truth is, it started as a dream.....

Starry Night!

Last night as I was getting into my car I looked up the skies, and saw that it was a sky full of stars. it’s not usual to see a starry night here in this city maybe this happened cause the skies were clear and cause of the heat that we are experiencing, as I was looking up the skies I realized that the most important moments in my life have occurred under very clear starry nights.

When I was touring the world last year, and in Langkawi Island to be specific I spent few hours in a boat in the middle of the ocean during the dead of night. I'm not sure how I managed to accomplish this but I was alone, there I was, late at night in the middle of the ocean, lying on my back staring up at the sky, no city light to distract me. Above me was a vast expanse of sky and nothing but stars, thick stars, more stars than you can ever see in the city. At that moment, sitting in my boat under a very large sky, I felt the usual cliché’s thoughts: I felt like the smallest most insignificant speck in a very large universe. All my problems at the time -- feeling kind of lonely and depressed and what the future is hiding for me, all seemed rather unimportant, given all those stars and how many there were of them compared to the little thing that was me.

As I kept going from place to place and when I was in South Africa I had the occasion to relive this experience. I went scuba diving on a boat in the ocean, And on that boat I sat in the prow and watched the sun go down on the horizon, watched the sun pass beyond the edge of the world, and the stars come up as the light darkened into orange to purple to blue to black. All I saw was a thick blanket of stars above, and below was dark smear of ocean. No land, no street lights, no reflection of the city; nothing but stars and sea and me, alone on the boat feeling like there was nothing else left in the world to hold onto.
I figure that in our small little existences we have two, maybe three moments that define the way we live, that we remember as the most important moments of our lives. For me, they have always involved the feeling of being one sole person under a massive blanket of stars.

I figure that if you tallied up the most important moments of a thousand of us, a hundred thousand of us, we'd come up with a wide, rich, complex variety of experiences.

Women and how we complain!

Yes, I know I shouldn’t be doing this (posting things in my blog while I am at work) but I finished training on Friday and right now I have nothing to do, I hate it when I am still new in a job, there will be nothing to do for while but I was told that I will be supper busy soon, I cant wait cause I don’t like to be bored. Anyways, the reason that I decided to post something in my blog even though I am at work, is because I was talking to a friend of mine this morning over coffee about her relationship with her boyfriend, while we were talking about this hot subject, I have noticed something so major in us women, we tend to complain and analyze things beyond belief and mistakenly read between the lines, we say we want something but then when we get it we find something else to complain about, its like the never ending story, now I kinda understand where men are coming from sometimes, and why they get frustrated with us, but hey! This is part of being a woman and it’s in our genes to complain about anything and everything, weather they choose to keep up with it, its their choice but I know that they cant live without us and the feeling is mutual. There is nothing that we can do about it to change because we try too but in vain. I am saying that cause I was a little bit frustrated by my friend while she was talking about her relationship and I felt kinda bad for the poor guy, but I managed to make her understand where her boyfriend is coming from. But at the same time I told her to be cautious and never give a man 100 percent of her trust, always give them 80 percent and that I think is fair!.

Ooo well! gatta go back to work, someone IMed me to sit with them while creating orders and projects, but I will for sure elaborate more on this topic some other time just thought that it’s a good thing to share. Yes I do agree that us women could drive anyone to madness especially the opposite sex…

The thin line between life and death.

Two weeks with good news and bad news, two weeks of a new beginning and end of a life, a very close friend to the family passed away last week, for no reason just cause he had a cold, I was shocked when i heard the news, the heart breaking part is that he was engaged to be married this summer, and his fiancé was away for work, when I heard the news i realized how short life is and the thin line between life and death, it’s scary but its part of life, and as scary as it is we have to accept it and life goes on, its hard at the beginning but we always manage to move on.


Now it’s the new beginning part, I have another new job. I know that I have started a new job few months ago, but it did not work out very well, in fact, I hated it. I am very grateful with this new job, because it is something that I always wanted to go back too. I think that god was watching over me, cause the past few months I was angry at myself because of a very bad decision that I have made. but now all is good cause I found what I always wanted and I am so grateful, the only bad thing about the new job is that it is still far from where I live, almost 40 minutes drive every day back and forth, but I got use to it so I am not complaining I am just venting.

Amazing how in two weeks so many things could happen, people die and live, or go away to start new beginnings. Life is a constant change that never ends. It’s shocking how we go through life without realizing this fact, even though it is right in front of us. We only see it when something very bad happens to us like “death” but then again we manage to move on and forget about it until some other disaster happens in our lives. Even though we see it every day in the news, we choose to forget it because it is not affecting us. I think that we should always remember that, that day would come where there will be no sun shine anymore, so we should be happy with what we have and appreciate every second of the day and night. Look at the stars and moon and always treat a new day as if we are born that day and that its going to be our last day on earth no matter how old we are. So enjoy life to the fullest!

Slow Dance!

This is a poem written by a teenager with cancer...


Have you ever watched kids on a Marry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain slapping on the ground?
Ever followed a butterfly’s erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?
You better slow down, don’t dance so fast.
Time is short, the music won’t last.
Do you run through each day on the fly?
When you ask how are you, do you hear the reply?
When the day is done, do you lie in your bed with the next hundred chores running through your head?
You’d better slow down, don’t dance so fast, time is short, the music won’t last.
Ever told your child, we’ll do it tomorrow? And in your haste not see his sorrow, ever lost touch, let a good friendship die cause you never had time to call and say “hi”.
You’d better slow down, don’t dance so fast, time is short and the music won’t last.


P.S: Sometimes we do take our lives for granted we better start enjoying it cause we never know when it will be taken away from us....

Walking and singing and jumping in the rain!!!

Yesterday it was raining as we all know, and I was bored so I decided that I need to go for a walk, I looked outside the window, it was cloudy and a little dark, I thought to myself that should be ok for me to go for a half an hour walk, and I did as I was walking I was thinking about lots of things , and that made me go further than I anticipated cause I wasn’t paying attention to where exactly I was going, you see I know my neighbourhood very well, no matter where I go I know how to find my way back, suddenly it started to rain real hard, it was pouring and I was laughing and thinking by the time I go back home I will be soaked with water but I didn’t care, I kept walking and sometimes running and jumping, I was happy and I was feeling nothing even though my mind was still thinking, I actually had to tell myself “ Imane stop thinking everything will be ok” and that’s true, I got another opportunity to start again and this time I will not screw it up I promised myself not too. So I kept smiling and walking in the rain and as I was walking someone offered me a ride home, he’s my neighbour and he’s so nice but I said no thank you I am ok, he didn’t believe me at the beginning but I explained to him that I love to walk in the rain so he let me go but before he left he told me that if I need a ride to the doctor that I should let him know, I smiled and said ok. Any how I kept on walking until I finally came home soaked with water and happy I was actually relaxed and satisfied for no reason. I took a quick shower and then took my car for a ride also under the rain, I listened to music and sang along it was lots of fun, sometimes its nice to spend some time alone it gives us peace and relaxation beyond belief, I did one final stop before heading back home I had to fill my car with gas so I did and as I was feeding my car it started to rain heavily again so I smiled and thought this I think is a good luck charm cause every time I am outside it pours maybe its a message that everything that is going wrong in my life is going to be finally be ok, I really do hope so.

My battle with the unknown.....

Recently I have been trying to update my blog, I know it’s been a while since I wrote something, and I know that I usually write once or twice a week, but for some reason my mind is blocked. I have no idea why, my life is a constant change, as I mentioned before nothing stays the same in my world, the year just started and so many things already happened, I don’t know why! I have to always worry about tomorrow, I always ask myself “ why can’t I live like so many other people, have a routine in my life” unfortunately this never happens to me, I was just talking to my sister in the phone few minutes ago and she was complaining of her routine and that she needed to do something new in her life, I of course encouraged her to go back to school since her kids are old enough to take care of themselves, but as I was talking to her I was thinking “how come I don’t have this security, the security of being save, and not to worry about tomorrow or the unknown”. The unknown scares me like a horror movie scares a young child, it bugs me, it keeps me up, I know I shouldn’t worry cause what is meant to be, is meant to be, but I am only human and as I mentioned before one of my faults is worrying, even though I always say to myself “ don’t worry be happy” but it is easier said than done, I also complain a lot, I think that the people that knows me very well, knows how much I complain...., is that bad?!!!! but hey, it’s part of being me I guess.
So many things is happening and will for sure happen during the course of this year, I just hope that it will not be as bad as last year, last year started with me losing a job that I enjoyed and so many things came after that, so this year I hope from the bottom of my heart that it will be good, I will keep my fingers crossed for me and for whoever needs luck, the best thing about 2009 is that my friends were there for me when I needed them the most, I am so grateful for that and I know that they will be there for me when I need them this year during my battle with the unknown or with whatever my destiny is hiding for me....

When a man cries!!

Few weeks ago and in Xmas eve to be specific I had to stay late at work and one of my co-workers stayed late with me, because we were the only ones in the office we talked about so many things, he told me something that was shocking and sad at the same time. He told me about his love life and about the one true love that was in his life back in the days but few months before their wedding he lost his fiance to cancer it’s very sad indeed but what shocked me was that while he was talking about his lost love he cried even though this happened a long time ago, it’s amazing and touching to see an a man cry cause once upon a time he lost the person that he loved and apparently still love. Seeing him cry touched me, all I wanted to do is make him feel better, so I hugged him and told him “ hey it’s the holidays we are suppose to be celebrating and not crying”, while hugging him I said to myself “this is indeed true love”, it’s so unfortunate that it is very rare these days. Seeing a man cry is something I could never be able to describe it just shows how affectionate that person is and how much pain he still is in. As he was talking about his lost love, I was able to see the pain in his eyes and few seconds later I saw the tears, he was trying to hide them but he failed as his pain was hard to control. He told me that for some reason I reminded him of his lost love and he doesn’t really know why he shared his story with me. He actually gave me some advice about how men act when they like a woman, and he recommended a book for me which is called "men from mars , women from Venus" he said that it is a good book to read, he actually told me that it is my assignment during my 2 weeks off, the bad news is that I didn’t have enough time to go get the book and read it, I will try and get it sometime this week and read it cause I promised him that I will.

Anyway, ever since I saw that man cry cause he lost the love of his life made me realize that love do exist, I know it could be hard to find but it still happens. I just hope that the ending does not have to be this sad, and seeing a man cry is like a masterpiece, full of emotions and full of everything. I hope that I will someday find someone that would love me as much as this man loves his fiance.